It's only 12:51 and I am already starting a countdown to 5 o'clock somewhere. I did recently list my son for sale on Facebook. If you are interested, please visit my profile. I am exhausted which is partially my own fault because I am addicted to Pawn Stars on the History Channel. What can I say? I love old stuff.
Zachary told me he wanted Spaghetti-O's for lunch. I got out a can. "No, I want cereal." "You already said Spaghetti-O's." Tantrum. I made the Spaghetti-O's. I bring them to the table and he takes them into the living room while I am outside trying to sell a stroller to a girl. I come in. "Mommy, I spilled them on the carpet." The white carpet. "This is why we don't eat in the living room, take it to the table NOW." He picks up the bowl and what is left (about half a can of Spaghetti-O's) and starts to walk to the dining room, slips, falls, O's are everywhere. All over the floors, on the walls, covering the refrigerator and all over his feet. He stands up, having a tantrum, and slips in them and is now covered in sauce. Meanwhile, wakes up the baby who had JUST fallen asleep and he continues to scream. It was like conducting an orchestra. I don't know who writes this music, but I could use something a little more low-key.
One of those days.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
The Barking
Everything is going fairly well over here in the McClelland home. There are good days and bad, but you will have that when you combine a hormonal woman, a little boy who barks a lot, a one year old and a Daddy that works too much.
I will tell you one thing; two ain't got nothin' on three. If I survive this year of Zachary's life it will be a miracle. The attitude is making a serious appearance and resulting in many a timeout. The barking. O-M-G. If he barks again I think I may reach down his throat and rip out his voice box. "RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUFF!" This is his way of saying, "I don't like that you are telling me what to do," or, "Elaina, get off my toys." He mostly barks at his sister because it scares her, and she backs off from whatever they are playing with so she can cry.
Zachary: RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUF!
Me: Enough barking, NOW.
Zachary: I want to bark.
Me: Then do it quietly.
Zachary: No, I want to do it loudly.
Me: Then you can have a face smack.
Zachary: RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUF!
Attitude at its finest. Don't get me wrong, he is a very good boy, he just loves to push my buttons.
I realized this morning that I have created a sort of monster. We were playing Memory Match and I was getting rather frustrated with him because he didn't want to pay attention and continued to choose the same two cards EVERY turn, but then would get angry if I would get a match. When we finished, this is how it went:
Zachary: Now we can play another game!
Me: No, Mommy is frustrated. We will play another game later.
Zachary: I want to play another game now.
Me: Not right now, I am frustrated because you can't pay attention.
Zachary: (and I quote) Well, that is a shock.
I will tell you one thing; two ain't got nothin' on three. If I survive this year of Zachary's life it will be a miracle. The attitude is making a serious appearance and resulting in many a timeout. The barking. O-M-G. If he barks again I think I may reach down his throat and rip out his voice box. "RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUFF!" This is his way of saying, "I don't like that you are telling me what to do," or, "Elaina, get off my toys." He mostly barks at his sister because it scares her, and she backs off from whatever they are playing with so she can cry.
Zachary: RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUF!
Me: Enough barking, NOW.
Zachary: I want to bark.
Me: Then do it quietly.
Zachary: No, I want to do it loudly.
Me: Then you can have a face smack.
Zachary: RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUF!
Attitude at its finest. Don't get me wrong, he is a very good boy, he just loves to push my buttons.
I realized this morning that I have created a sort of monster. We were playing Memory Match and I was getting rather frustrated with him because he didn't want to pay attention and continued to choose the same two cards EVERY turn, but then would get angry if I would get a match. When we finished, this is how it went:
Zachary: Now we can play another game!
Me: No, Mommy is frustrated. We will play another game later.
Zachary: I want to play another game now.
Me: Not right now, I am frustrated because you can't pay attention.
Zachary: (and I quote) Well, that is a shock.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
The Beginning of Summer
I thought terrible two's were bad, but two ain't got nothin' on three. Between the attitude, selective listening and tantrums, it's proving to be quite a ride.
It hasn't been long since my last blog and still I come bearing stories aplenty. There is never a dull moment around here.
The other day I took the kids to the pool. It was a great day and the kids were exhausted by the end of it. When it came time to pick up the toys, Zachary wouldn't participate which scored him a timeout.
Me: You are in timeout for not helping pick up toys. Three minutes.
Zachary: I need to go potty.
Me: Then you can wait until you finish your timeout. If you pee your pants, I'll spank your butt.
Zachary: :::whips out penis while in timeout and pees onto the sidewalk while sitting there:::
My grandma: Well, at least he listened. You said don't pee your pants.
Another good one happened on Sunday at the pool. My cousin Ethan started sneezing and my mom said, "Bless you!" Right after that Zachary started saying, "A-shoo! A-shoo! A-shoo!" My mom said, "Bless you, Zachary!" Zachary said, "Now you say, A-sock!" I wasn't present for this one, but I came out to Aunt Colleen rolling on the sidewalk laughing.
Just this morning he decided to try my patience. He ate his yogurt while sitting on the couch and left it sitting on the arm.
Me: Zachary, please take care of your yogurt.
Zachary: ::walks over, moves yogurt, comes back::
Me: Where did your yogurt go? Did you throw it away?
Zachary: No, I put it behind the cushion so you wouldn't see it.
It's going to be a long summer.
It hasn't been long since my last blog and still I come bearing stories aplenty. There is never a dull moment around here.
The other day I took the kids to the pool. It was a great day and the kids were exhausted by the end of it. When it came time to pick up the toys, Zachary wouldn't participate which scored him a timeout.
Me: You are in timeout for not helping pick up toys. Three minutes.
Zachary: I need to go potty.
Me: Then you can wait until you finish your timeout. If you pee your pants, I'll spank your butt.
Zachary: :::whips out penis while in timeout and pees onto the sidewalk while sitting there:::
My grandma: Well, at least he listened. You said don't pee your pants.
Another good one happened on Sunday at the pool. My cousin Ethan started sneezing and my mom said, "Bless you!" Right after that Zachary started saying, "A-shoo! A-shoo! A-shoo!" My mom said, "Bless you, Zachary!" Zachary said, "Now you say, A-sock!" I wasn't present for this one, but I came out to Aunt Colleen rolling on the sidewalk laughing.
Just this morning he decided to try my patience. He ate his yogurt while sitting on the couch and left it sitting on the arm.
Me: Zachary, please take care of your yogurt.
Zachary: ::walks over, moves yogurt, comes back::
Me: Where did your yogurt go? Did you throw it away?
Zachary: No, I put it behind the cushion so you wouldn't see it.
It's going to be a long summer.
Monday, June 14, 2010
The Popsicles
Today I am purging (again). I love it. I get such a feeling of cleanliness. Tim is going to be out of town for the week and I need to feel accomplished, therefore, we start with the laundry room. I warned him two days ago.
Me: If you don't go through your t-shirts, when you return, half of them will be gone.
Him: Well, I will just go through the pile you leave.
Me: No, they will be gone. Not here. At Goodwill.
Him: Okay, I'll do it.
Me: No you won't.
Him: Yes, I will.
So, he didn't do it. Surprise! Needless to say, the shirts have been weeded and are in the back of the van ready to go to Goodwill. I don't understand why we have to save every t-shirt that we acquired during our school years. I am not kidding you when I say that he has his kindergarten t-shirt. Yes, that's right folks...he's a hoarder.
I spent the past hour cleaning out the laundry room while Zachary spent the last hour eating popsicles. He thought he was sneaking them, but there just comes a time when letting him eat a box full of frozen sugar is worth it to have some quiet time. Totally worth it. :::smiles:::
Elaina is down for a nap. She has been a feisty one lately. We went out for ice cream last night and you would have thought we gave each child a 20 oz of Mountain Dew for the car ride home. It was a roller coaster of emotions. The kids were buzzin'.
She said her first actual words this morning. "Bye bye" (while waving). I can't believe she is saying "bye-bye" before she is saying Mama. Not that she can't say mama, she just won't.
The other night at dinner...
Elaina: (very quietly) mama, mama, mama
Me: What? Yay, Laina! MAMA!
Elaina: BA-BA! Pa-Pa! DA-DA-DA-DA!
Me: Mama!
Elaina: DADA!
Lovely.
Me: If you don't go through your t-shirts, when you return, half of them will be gone.
Him: Well, I will just go through the pile you leave.
Me: No, they will be gone. Not here. At Goodwill.
Him: Okay, I'll do it.
Me: No you won't.
Him: Yes, I will.
So, he didn't do it. Surprise! Needless to say, the shirts have been weeded and are in the back of the van ready to go to Goodwill. I don't understand why we have to save every t-shirt that we acquired during our school years. I am not kidding you when I say that he has his kindergarten t-shirt. Yes, that's right folks...he's a hoarder.
I spent the past hour cleaning out the laundry room while Zachary spent the last hour eating popsicles. He thought he was sneaking them, but there just comes a time when letting him eat a box full of frozen sugar is worth it to have some quiet time. Totally worth it. :::smiles:::
Elaina is down for a nap. She has been a feisty one lately. We went out for ice cream last night and you would have thought we gave each child a 20 oz of Mountain Dew for the car ride home. It was a roller coaster of emotions. The kids were buzzin'.
She said her first actual words this morning. "Bye bye" (while waving). I can't believe she is saying "bye-bye" before she is saying Mama. Not that she can't say mama, she just won't.
The other night at dinner...
Elaina: (very quietly) mama, mama, mama
Me: What? Yay, Laina! MAMA!
Elaina: BA-BA! Pa-Pa! DA-DA-DA-DA!
Me: Mama!
Elaina: DADA!
Lovely.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
The Sunny Day
It's a great day. Zachary just helped himself to a 12 cup bowl of watermelon and Elaina loves batteries. Seriously, she can sniff them out like nothing I have ever seen. It doesn't help that Zachary's trains go through them like water. Then he just leaves them on the floor. I know, you're shocked.
We have done so much since we woke up this morning. Lots of firsts. First farmer's market trip of the season. We ended up with watermelon, asparagus, tomatoes, cookies and a tomato plant. There was even a man strummin' his ole banjo. I asked him if he was in the kitchen with Dinah, and he just looked at me like I was crazy. Okay, I made that last part up, but he really did have a banjo.
It was so beautiful out this afternoon that we also had our first encounter with the sprinkler. Zachary was less than impressed with the fact that the water was giving him hypothermia, so we went on a hunt for his pool so we could fill it and let it warm in the sun. I found it in the top of the garage and it is too big for me to get it down by myself. I found the sled in the backyard and filled that up with water instead. I told him it would have to do until daddy gets home. He told me. "Why? All you need is a ladder." I guess it makes me feel good that he thinks I'm supermom, but this supermom isn't risking her life for a kiddie pool.
When we came in the house for lunch, he had stripped out of his shorts and spent a couple of hours in the nude. Once he finished, he got one his fireman rain boots and his metallic blue helmet (yes, that's all) and told me he was going back for more swimming. I told him that I thought some shorts would be a good idea.
We have done so much since we woke up this morning. Lots of firsts. First farmer's market trip of the season. We ended up with watermelon, asparagus, tomatoes, cookies and a tomato plant. There was even a man strummin' his ole banjo. I asked him if he was in the kitchen with Dinah, and he just looked at me like I was crazy. Okay, I made that last part up, but he really did have a banjo.
It was so beautiful out this afternoon that we also had our first encounter with the sprinkler. Zachary was less than impressed with the fact that the water was giving him hypothermia, so we went on a hunt for his pool so we could fill it and let it warm in the sun. I found it in the top of the garage and it is too big for me to get it down by myself. I found the sled in the backyard and filled that up with water instead. I told him it would have to do until daddy gets home. He told me. "Why? All you need is a ladder." I guess it makes me feel good that he thinks I'm supermom, but this supermom isn't risking her life for a kiddie pool.
When we came in the house for lunch, he had stripped out of his shorts and spent a couple of hours in the nude. Once he finished, he got one his fireman rain boots and his metallic blue helmet (yes, that's all) and told me he was going back for more swimming. I told him that I thought some shorts would be a good idea.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
The Older Woman
Okay, so I forgot that this was actually what I was going to blog about today, so, lucky you, you get two.
The funny thing is that as you get older, so do the people around you. I liked to think that my mother would always be a spring chicken, but as the years go by, my hopes are crushed.
Let me give you the rundown. First of all, she loves cream of wheat. I think that statement can stand alone.
She is also taking to the loving of one restaurant. By one restaurant, I mean that she likes to go there every time she goes out. That's right. You guessed it...Bob Evans. Almost the elderly equivalent of Bill Knapps or Old Country Buffet. What's even better is that she goes there for fish, baked potato and broccoli and even comments on the portion sizes. When she finishes with her dinner I pretty much push her out in her wheel chair and load her onto the bus to go back to "the home". (Don't worry, I wipe her face first.)
This weekend, I finally realized that it is over. My mother is old. While on the dance floor Saturday night, with her less than "hip" moves, she actually pulled her pedometer out of her pocket and said, "Yes! I am almost to 10,000 steps." Aging at its finest.
Love you, Mom!
The funny thing is that as you get older, so do the people around you. I liked to think that my mother would always be a spring chicken, but as the years go by, my hopes are crushed.
Let me give you the rundown. First of all, she loves cream of wheat. I think that statement can stand alone.
She is also taking to the loving of one restaurant. By one restaurant, I mean that she likes to go there every time she goes out. That's right. You guessed it...Bob Evans. Almost the elderly equivalent of Bill Knapps or Old Country Buffet. What's even better is that she goes there for fish, baked potato and broccoli and even comments on the portion sizes. When she finishes with her dinner I pretty much push her out in her wheel chair and load her onto the bus to go back to "the home". (Don't worry, I wipe her face first.)
This weekend, I finally realized that it is over. My mother is old. While on the dance floor Saturday night, with her less than "hip" moves, she actually pulled her pedometer out of her pocket and said, "Yes! I am almost to 10,000 steps." Aging at its finest.
Love you, Mom!
The Personal Heater
Good morning. I am having some coffee and trying to get motivated. The plan is to take my kids to the sitter and get some grocery shopping done. We are pretty much living off animal crackers and fruit roll-ups at this point.
I am so glad that I got so much done yesterday as far as planting goes. I wish it were Wednesday so I could go to the farmer's market. I just love it and I am planning on getting my veggies tomorrow (to plant). Last year Tim and I had a competition and he tried to grow his from seeds. I'll let you guess who won...but I am pretty sure that I already blogged about that.
The beast just woke up. We are trying to break the habit of him getting in our bed each night. We always have good intentions, but it's a lot easier to say that we will take him back to his bed at 10:00 before we fall asleep than it is at 2:00 am when he actually gets in. Part of me knows that they grow up too quickly and loves having him for my personal heater, but the other part doesn't like the fact that I start feeling like the hunchback of Notre Dame. My mom said to start making him a little bed on the floor and telling him that he can lay there. It's a great idea, but that would involve purging all the junk from my room. Ugh. Maybe some more coffee first.
I am so glad that I got so much done yesterday as far as planting goes. I wish it were Wednesday so I could go to the farmer's market. I just love it and I am planning on getting my veggies tomorrow (to plant). Last year Tim and I had a competition and he tried to grow his from seeds. I'll let you guess who won...but I am pretty sure that I already blogged about that.
The beast just woke up. We are trying to break the habit of him getting in our bed each night. We always have good intentions, but it's a lot easier to say that we will take him back to his bed at 10:00 before we fall asleep than it is at 2:00 am when he actually gets in. Part of me knows that they grow up too quickly and loves having him for my personal heater, but the other part doesn't like the fact that I start feeling like the hunchback of Notre Dame. My mom said to start making him a little bed on the floor and telling him that he can lay there. It's a great idea, but that would involve purging all the junk from my room. Ugh. Maybe some more coffee first.
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