Me: You stink. Did you toot?
Zachary: No Mommy, I farted.
Me: No, we don't say farted, we say tooted.
Zachary: But I farted.
Me: But we say tooted.
Zachary: Daddy's says farted.
Me: But you say tooted. Daddy says tooted.
Zachary: No he don't. Daddy says farted.
Me: No, no one should say farted. You tooted.
Zachary: No I didn't. I farted.
Three minutes later...
Zachary: ::rips a big one::
Me: Zachary, did you toot again?
Zachary: No Mommy, I didn't.
Me: Was it Elaina?
Zachary: No, it was me. I farted.
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